An Online Therapists Perspective on Healing Trauma.
We are all looking for that “Ah-Hah” moment, that silver lining where everything just clicks. I mean, that’s what we’ve been told. How many movies have you seen where the main character finally gets it and then they live happily ever after? Too many to count. It sends the message that if you don’t have that “Ah-Hah” moment you can, and won’t heal. As an online and in-person trauma therapist, I’m here to tell you that many people don’t get that “Ah-Hah” moment and are able to heal from the most difficult traumas.
Let’s go back to High School.
I was 16 years old at the time, a junior in high school. At that point in my life, I was really struggling with an eating disorder. Not to get into too many details about it, but my ED started with me restricting food and then after several months switched to binging and restricting. I remember feeling out of control with food (hence the binging) and slowly putting back the weight I worked so hard to lose. Emotionally, I was a wreck. At that time the only way I knew how to stop feeling this way was to get in control of food again and lose the weight I put on. There was one day I went running outside and felt so overwhelmed with emotion and decided that “this” moment was going to be the moment, my silver lining, where I would finally be okay. I felt inspired. I felt hopeful. The next day I was back to square one feeling all of the shit I had been feeling over the past several months. My silver lining moment didn’t work.
My best friend (Anna) and I in 2010
Healing Happens In the Calm.
It wasn’t until around 2017 that my “ah-hah” moment was the realization that healing isn’t the one moment where I felt inspired or passionate. It was in the day-to-day. It was the small choices I made when everything felt okay. It was showing up in the insignificant moments to prioritize my healing. It was actually pretty boring if I’m honest. Once this realization clicked for me I kinda became angry. I started resenting the messages I received since childhood that in order to heal I needed to find my silver lining. I became angry no one told me that it wasn’t my fault I couldn’t find my “Ah-Hah” moment.
I Made My Healing My Responsibility
When it came to my feelings around my own trauma and eating disorder I felt like a lost puppy. I wanted to stop feeling the way I was feeling but had no idea how. What a blessing in disguise that simultaneously I was in the process of becoming a therapist. Learning about mental health, therapeutic interventions, and trauma made things click for me. Especially learning about trauma and how it changes your brain. I learned that to heal my own trauma I needed to do the work to rewire my brain when I was NOT in crisis. So I started. I began by focusing on using my body to heal my brain. This meant learning about grounding and mindfulness practices. I started doing yoga which taught me that as long as I can control my breathing, I can tolerate discomfort. Although I don’t have a current yoga practice, I continue to take that message into other hard areas of my life: If I can control my breathing, I can tolerate whatever comes my way.
Does It Mean I’m All Better?
Me in Scandinavia 2022
No…and yes. Let me explain.
Do I still struggle with things? Of course. However, am I better able to handle the things I struggle with? Hell yes! Do I struggle less than I did before? Yup! We are humans who experience a beautiful and vast array of emotions. We are not built to be in a constant state of joy, happiness, calmness, contentment…etc. We are built to experience all emotions. ALL of them.
Healing trauma doesn’t get rid of uncomfortable emotions.
It teaches us how to lean into those emotions and let them go.
Begin Working With An Online Therapist in Philadelphia, PA
Distance shouldn’t determine the mental health support available to you when overcoming past trauma. Our team would be happy to offer support from our Philadelphia, PA-based practice. You can start your therapy journey with Revive Therapy by following these simple steps:
Meet a caring therapist
Start improving your relationship with your body and overcome trauma!
Other Services Offered with Revive Therapy
We understand you may be experiencing a variety of mental health concerns. This is why we are happy to offer mental health support including PTSD treatment and trauma therapy, body image issues, binge eating, eating disorders, and more. I offer support with EMDR therapy if you’re in need of more specialized support. Additionally, all services are offered via online therapy in Pennsylvania. When you’re ready for support. Feel free to visit our blog to learn more. Or, call now!